14. Hanging, Meaning & Evaluating

(6/6/23)
Today I decided the definite sequence of the three paintings I have selected for my FMP. I also decided the method I would be using to hang my paintings up too. 

I previously had a few ideas on how to hang these free sheets of painted calico as I was working on the paintings, one was to attach planks of wood to the top and bottom and let them hand from nails in the wall, but that would have impacted the surface of the painting. But as I had had peer feedback consistently saying people liked the free flowing sheet and to make an effort not to constrain the free quality of the paintings by making the waves and curled edges straight. So I thought if hammering metal rings through each corner in order to string them up on the walls / boards, but I didn’t like the idea of hammering holes in the paintings so I managed to source some Brass effect Upholstery Tacks with nice rounded heads on them to pin each corner of the painting to the wool boards they hang on. These tacks are highly effective and constant efficient and have a great neat look after being hammered in. Below I will attatch a close up picture of a tack in the corner of the paining. 
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1ESjFlIk_MVJn8mi-usuKoyg_o1YnMMmg

When I came to deciding an order to these paintings I found it fairly easy as there are two square paintings and one rectangle. Logically to me the rectangle fit well on the centre and the two square ones either side, but what made this selection easier was that each head is turning inwards in their respective ways to face the centre rectangle painting, and it just so happened that the sequence works very well and I am extremely pleased with how seemlessley they fit together, and especially because I did not pay attention to the sequence of how they would be hung while making the paintings. Below I will attach a picture of the three paintings hung in the show room for the FMP. 
https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=13GnO4E1wib41KvOk20OeILIEDOgnh90T

In the process of creating these paintings I took my usual approach of setting to making the paintings with how I am feeling and how my life is informing my thoughts and emotions at a given time. In this collection of paintings I considered my every material choice and even painting style. I chose to paint on calico instead of wood, mainly for a change as to not stagnate using the same materials, but this had the added bonus of being more cost effective and less labour intensive by not having to haul wood into the college building. Then the materials I used were largely the same but the more painterly approach I took was the change. Deciding to opt for a more free and crude style that was naive and less restrictive to myself, my emotions and my creativity. 

I have trouble describing my work and its meaning at times, but I keep having the term "stream of consciousness" come to mind and that will be the term I use to describe the meaning I attach to this body of work. My work is very personal to me and therefor I work through very personal issues in making this work and I feel that the through line in the three paintings I have selected speak volumes to this inner struggle of emotions and the intensity they can strike within me as life happens, in real time. 

The blacked out eyes and grimaces with teeth bare in these paintings are a visual representation of feeling the overwhelming desire to cover my eyes and scream into the abyss as I find myself in personal situations in my home life that I have no control over, so the only thing left to do is idly watch the torment unfold and constantly wait for the punch. The style I have painted these paintings in are even a nod to this feeling of screaming into an abyss and throwing a fit as it is very free and not regulated by proportion or anatomy. 

These paintings are a representation of the push and pull of wanting to hide and fade away, but ultimately knowing that you can't. Which creates a grim reality to face alongside personal circumstances that are less than desirable to say the least without going into detail. 

Although these paintings are very personal and depict personal struggles, the forms in the paintings are not of myself. The faces and forms in these works are merely placeholders for conveying the feeling of hiding away and not wanting to see the problems one must face, screaming at a world that will not go away no matter how much you show your teeth, snarl and hiss at it. There is a Friedrich Nietzsche quote that speaks to this as these forms with blacked out eyes and grimacing mouths are the result of the trials of ones life and circumstances. The quote is as follows, "Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you".
These paintings are a representation of an abyss beginning to gaze back into me, but not yet at a point of no return, there is a chance to counteract the abyss, everything hangs in a balance. 

This Triptych / body of work is titled: The Abyss Gazes Also Into You Pt 1, 2 & 3. 

More Later 

Lots Of Love 

John Hancock X  




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